27 April, 2024

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A Personal Thank You Letter To HLD Mahindapala

By V. Kanthaiya

Dearest HLD Mahindapala Sir,

I read your letter addressed to me in Colombo Telegraph and this is in reply to that.

I have requested the Colombo Telegraph to publish this personal letter on their website since I was not able to obtain your address and I believe most Colombo Telegraph Readers, other than you, will not read this since this is addressed to you.

MahindapalaFirst of all, it was a great honour to be written a letter by a living legend like you Sir. After all, I am an amateur. Please be kind enough to accept my heartfelt gratitude for that privilege you have given to me.

At the same time, I was saddened by the fact that you have identified me as an unpatriotic, Tamil Nationalist, pro west and pro power devolution element supporting the hypothetical good governance concept in Sri Lanka. It is completely wrong, sir. We both are in the same team. You must be definitely confused about this. So please be kind enough to let me explain everything from the beginning.

Dear Sir, V. Kanthaiya Stands for Vallipuram Kanthaiya not for Vattukoatai Kanthaiya and I was born quite recently, in 1986. I work for a corporate company as a Business Analyst, for a fixed monthly salary, which will increase only once a year despite whatever increases in my workload during the period. Every day, morning to evening and mostly to late night, my job is to analyse businesses and tell my boss whether the business will be profitable or not, and if not, I am supposed to make recommendations on how to make them profitable.

Once during my analysis about industries in Sri Lanka, I found one which gives an enormous rate of return for zero investment. Now you would be quite interested to know what it is. Hold on for a while.

Let me ask you a question. Did you know about this Venerable Galagoda Attegnanasara Thero, whom most “True Sri Lankans” consider a Godsend, sent to protect the cattle from the Muslim community, before the halal issue? Of course, I don’t believe he came down from the heavens, in 2011 to protect the cattle. He must have existed long before that. But after he founded the Bodu Bala Sena (BBS) and started his peaceful protests to protect the cattle and the citizens of this country from halal food, he became a major figure in Sri Lanka politics. Right before the 2015 presidential election, Ven. Galagoda Attegnanasara Thero was a man of wealth and fame and still he is.

Have you ever known Wimalasiri Gamlath, a political columnist who shared even his shirts and trousers with two of his roommates? Probably not. He is now called Comrade Wimal Weerawansa. Have you heard the names Wasantha Bandara and Dr. Gunadasa Amerasekara before 2010? Perhaps very rarely. But now these people are guardians of our motherland. They are national celebrities. They are men of fame and perhaps they can be men of wealth too (of which I am not sure).

How did these people achieve prominence in our society? Well, this was the interesting question I was asking myself. If you have watched Hollywood movies (with respect, I don’t mean those nameless adult educational movies you watch for self actualization), you would have observed that most of the blockbuster movies are based on alien invasions and Godzilla attacks, because people always want to feel the thrill of being attacked. So Hollywood entertainers have used the concept of the mighty Godzilla attack and alien invasion of the USA, as a key theme in their movies.

In Sri Lanka, the entertainment industry is not technically capable of producing these Godzilla and alien invasion movies and the cost would be extremely high in comparison to the target market. However, our intellectuals have found the Sri Lankan version of Godzilla and aliens, who are none other than the Tamils and Muslims of this country. I have mentioned some human names in the above paragraphs. These people are the inventors of our own Godzilla attack and alien invasion stories. These intellectuals created the Tamil Aliens who invade Sri Lanka from Jaffna (and also from Tamil Nadu due to the emotional, psychological osmosis) and the Muslim Godzilla which prey on cattle.

The Sri Lankan version of the Godzilla attack and alien invasion (Tamil and Muslim invasion) stories are mainly used to entertain the masses in the political arena rather than the conventional entertainment media. I believe that is reasonable. For example, just imagine, would you go and listen to a political rally in Kolonnawa where the speakers talk only about the paradigm shift necessitated in our country’s foreign, fiscal, monetary and health care policy; even if you are paid with a parcel of fried rice with chicken and a 250 ml arrack bottle?

Later I observed both print and electronic media also provide the same Muslim Godzilla attack and alien Tamil invasion stories to entertain the masses. These are termed political columns and the pioneers and dominant players of this industry are none other than Dr. Dayan Jayatilleka, C A Chandraprema, Rajpal Abeynayake (now he has forgotten his office address by mistake and because of that appears not to be working there anymore), Shenali Waduge and above all, the eminent intellectual H L D Mahindapala (That’s you sir).

At this point, I also wanted to try my luck in this entertainment industry and I started it with a letter praising Dr. Dayan Jayatilleka for the great service he has done to protect the country. But it ended up in a disaster. To my greatest dismay, all the pro-west, neo Zionist, neo separatist Eelamists have branded my letter to Dr. D J as a satire, but in reality it is a serious letter praising Dr D J.

Pro-West, Pro-hypothetical “yahapalanaye” elements keep on portraying you and Dr D J as Sinhala Buddhist ultra nationalist/racist. But I know, Sir, what you all are doing is entertaining the masses who need the intoxication from nationalism/racism.

I can prove this by a simple logic. Does an arrack shop owner needs to be an alcoholic to sell the arrack? Does a “kudu” muthalali need to be a drug addict to to do his “kudu” business? No. Then why does society (or the Colombo Telegraph readers) think you are an ultra nationalist/racist? I believe this is a great injustice done to the leading entertainers like you and Dr D J.

Once my marketing management lecturer explained to me the features of this and also proved that the Victory celebrations of May 2009 are not a show of racial supremacy. He asked me the following set of questions and answered them as well. “Can we wage war against india or Pakistan and win?” No, because they are nuclear powers and they can simply destroy our country in seconds.

“Can we wage war against smaller countries like Maldives, Mauritius and Singapore and win?” No, because the regional superpowers will intervene and nail us. We pompously celebrated victory over the LTTE, despite the fact that the organization was completely outnumbered, outgunned and most of its cadres are child recruits; because it is the one and only war we can ever win.

Certainly we are not going to wage any war in the future and we are not going to win any. So why miss the chance to celebrate? This is nothing to do with ethnic relations. Take this example. Our people are still talking about our victory in the 1996 Cricket World Cup and we still call ourselves the undefeated cricket world champions. No matter we had four One Day International (ODI) world cup matches after 1996 and we couldn’t win any. We want to be victorious. We want to be triumphant. We want to feel that we are better than others for whatsoever reasons or even for no reason. This is the reason why we are fighting with the already dead Prabhakaran in our political (entertainment) columns.

My lecturer also noted how much we are desperate to be victorious deep in our mindset. He asked me another set of questions. “Have you observed when our cricket team is completely nailed by Australia, South Africa or India and lose the entire tour, we immediately schedule another tour with countries like Zimbabwe, Kenya and Bangladesh? We go to these countries and nail these cricket teams and create world records and then say, “We did it because we are lions”.

Another interesting point my lecturer made is that even though our nationalist/racist entertainment industry curses the LTTE, Prabhakaran and the Tamil Diaspora whenever and wherever possible, the industry can’t survive without them.

The person who benefited the most and was worst affected by the destruction of the LTTE is none other than our former president Mahinda Rajapaksa. He benefitted in the 2010 election because people considered him as the one who defeated the LTTE and in 2015 he lost because people forgot the LTTE, and considered him as the one who built the Hambantota Harbour and the Mattale Airport.

Perhaps Mahinda Rajapaksa could have won the 2015 presidential election if he had put up mega size cutouts of Prabhakaran (not Mr. Prabhakaran) with a caption below, “Do you still remember this person?” Unfortunately, Mr. Rajapaksa put up his own mega cutouts with his typical smile which everyone hated, and he lost the presidential election. So the theory is this. We need the LTTE, Prabhakaran and the Tamil Diaspora to entertain people.

So far our nationalist/racist entertainment industry has grown in leaps and bounds as people in the country were identifying themselves as Sinhalese or Tamils or Muslims, not as Sri Lankans. However, there is an evolving dangerous general public behaviour. These days people send their children to “international schools” to study in the English medium despite the fact they love to be Sinhalese or Tamil or Muslim and by this, they expect their children would be able to get job opportunities in the international labour market or migrate to another country, in the future.

On the other hand the Tamil youth, who were once willing to give their life for Tamil Eelam, no longer bother about that. Instead they are willing to give their life for a boat ride to Australia or even Canada. It seems our society does not want to identify itself in seclusion and is in the process of preparing itself to integrate with the rest of the world. This is a major threat to our nationalist/racist entertainment industry and this can even completely wipe it out. Because, given people think they are part of the world, not part of a religion or ethnicity, they will not find nationalism/racism entertaining them anymore.

Now our industry depends on intellectuals like you, Dr D J and Malinda Seneviratne (and of course on Rajpal Abeynayake) for its survival and growth. It is your collective responsibility to take it to the next generation sir.

I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me this opportunity to write to you and request you to be kind enough to bless me for my further industry analysis.

With infinite scale of respect,

V. Kanthaiya

P.S: The donkey I have is a die-hard fan of yours and wants to meet you for a discussion on the future of our motherland.

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Latest comments

  • 16
    1

    Mr V Kanthaiya; I knew you are ‘something’, of a master, after reading your first article about “Racism”…then I read your ‘damned good’ second one. No doubt, Now I’m you fan for ever !

    Great reply to HLDM or whatever ..pala..he is..

    Whether what you write is called satire, serious, joke or anything, I just don`t care but love reading them. This is the real entertainment Mr.VK. Just continue and keep on entertaining us, unlike the other entertainers like the so called nationalist-racist kinds !

    You rock Mr.!!

    • 4
      1

      If Mahindapala is somewhat thoughtful – he will have to spend at least few days – not being able to digest the message Mr writer has sent across. But the man is even more resistent than the thugs attacked the UNP fact finding mission in Hambantota – not forgetting that toy pistol mayor – an another similar to that of Hambantota tourist rapist but all alone a die hard henchman of Mahinda Rajapakshe

    • 2
      2

      This kind of fakel tasters – Mahindapala et al. can sing and entertain their leader now without making use of their times. Defeated leader has got plenty of time though his poower is fully uprooted as nothing could remain .. ascending to the 100 day programme, everything will be dminished from the bugger even if his believes aare far from ours.
      The day people will be aware – his brother Basil Rajapakshe will be brought before the courts are nearing now. The man andhis mimics sent a message across that he is a born abuser. I never trusted the man – nor have respect towards his brother Gota – knowing the way he managed to paint the picture in favour of them. Real war hero could have faced all death threats while staying in the prison. But the cold heartedness of Rajapakshes allowed it. Sarath Fonseka never gave up fought further- so today he is the winner of all the revolution led by MS-RW-CBK et al.

    • 2
      0

      V. Kanthaiya

      Thanks for exposing H L D Mahinda-pala, the Shill and whitewasher.

      “Now our industry depends on intellectuals like you, Dr D J and Malinda Seneviratne (and of course on Rajpal Abeynayake) for its survival and growth. It is your collective responsibility to take it to the next generation sir.”

      Re: HLDM “P.S: The donkey I have is a die-hard fan of yours and wants to meet you for a discussion on the future of our motherland.”

      HLDM was following donkeys, and the donkeys follow HLDM.

      [Edited out]

  • 13
    1

    Dear Kanthia
    this is great. I was rolling on the floor laughing. This one and your previous article ‘appreciating the one and only political scientist DJ’ are masterpieces. Keep up your good work.

    J

  • 12
    1

    Dear Kanthaiya,

    this is a wonderful piece really. Thanks very much Kathaiya :) one of the best writers on this forum. Above all the last two lines were the best
    “The donkey I have is a die-hard fan of yours and wants to meet you for a discussion on the future of our motherland”

    Ziamesian twin of DJ -Mahindapala will have to be awake for the rest next weeks being unable to digest this letter.

  • 12
    1

    Birds of the same feather gets together. Four bloody crooks D.J., Malinda, Rajpal and ofcourse HLD formerly of Bera gedara. Even if Mahindapala changed his hibtat from Sri Lanka to Australia his dirty spots are visible

  • 11
    0

    hilarious.

  • 10
    0

    Thank you for creating a CT Entertainment Edition, all with the famous
    100 day segment in new Lanka! Looking forward to more edits.

  • 13
    0

    Hats off to you Mr Kanthaiya. That was a knock out blow for a veteran.

    I hope for his sake HLD will not get back in the ring trying to challenge you.

    Keep up the good work!

  • 12
    1

    Dear Writer,

    you please make arrangements your donkey to meet Dayan Jayathilaka too, because I believe that can help him to see it beyond. DJ is no too late if he wants to see a change in his being.

  • 13
    0

    This is brilliant stuff, Kanthiaya. Everyone should read this

  • 11
    0

    Brilliant! I am a Sinhalese Buddhist, but I applaud you for calling a spade a spade. The jesters, DJ, Mahndapala, Malinda Senviratne, and Rajpal to name a few, are in my book a bunch of vermin. Their only goal in life is to spew racist rhetoric and have uneducated, unsophisticated, naïve Sri Lankan down the road of destruction. It would be better if they found employment in the middle east as janitors. They would be doing a favor to all Sri Lankans!

  • 9
    0

    They are scratching their back each other.
    They also licked mahinda Rajapaksa’s boot together.

    Mahindapala is a not only boot licker of Mahinda Rajapaksa but also…….licker.

    Still he continuously does it.

  • 8
    2

    I thank you for illuminating the racist mind set. We need people of his kind to remind us the racists (both tamil and sinhala) among us.

    HLDM exemplifies the malaise afflicting our mother lanka. This malaise is perpetuated by Hindians for their hidden agendas.

    Majority of Srilankans knew about modawansas and medamulana murderers and still voted for this criminals.

    We need another mahinda to change the voting behaviours!

    • 3
      1

      Ken Robert

      I always thought satire and a sense of humour are more dangerous than an AK 47 wielding terrorist(?).

      Dayan and Mahinda could see laughter as a potential threat to national security and sovereignty of this island for they have tirelessly worked to build a “tight a***d nation”.

      The film ” Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb” will be banned under Dayan/Mahindapala dictatorship.

  • 4
    3

    Dear Kanthaiya

    I have a bone to pick with you! As long as your satire/cynicism/tongue-in-cheek is targeted (quite amusingly and brilliantly I would say) at HLD I was okay with you.

    But the moment you targeted our cricket team I lost my patience! This is a no go land for you my friend. This is sacred for all Sri Lankans who do not have any other hero to worship and be proud of. Our cricket team’s successes define us as Sri Lankans! Particularly when we are in the cusp of another World Cup! It maybe that New Zealand is currently hammering us to oblivion. But we Sri Lankans have no other option or heros. So in the future any other topic is fine to belittle and make your point but not our sacred cow who gives us the milk of success in eyes of the world.

    So, damn HLD, Rajpal, Dr. DJ et al any time you like, but not our sacred cow the Sri Lankan Cricket Team. If you do that I will write another nasty letter like this!!! So beware!!!!!!

    • 4
      1

      Asaipillai

      You have no sense of timing my friend. Like a chronic sinus patient, you had to eject your snot at the breakfast table and spoil the meal for everyone.

      • 0
        0

        Navin

        Are you seious! If you had read it carefully and not been a dickhead you would have understood it was simply written jest!

        You just showed everyone that you are uptight hothead! Pipe down man!

  • 9
    0

    This is a very entertaining reply. I think these exchanges will keep the readers’ interest in CT going. Looking forward to HLDM’s response.
    Keep them coming. Good if DJ the joker too joins in! Wimal weerawansa could add some spice. But I don’t know how good he is with his knowledge of English? In Sinhala of course he is a giant! Soon he might find himself with a lot of time on his hands in Welikade. This could keep him busy!

  • 10
    1

    Excellent stuff. A slap on the face for racist Mahindapala…

  • 8
    1

    HDL lives in Glen Waverly a suburb in Melbourne. So it begs the question as to why he lives in a Western Country when he is anti west and a patriotic Lankan.

    What a load of rubbish all this is…

    • 3
      1

      You give HLD too much credit for integrity. Unlike ordinary people he is not restrained by any moral sense of right and wrong.

      He is nothing but a mercenary, singing for his kadayappan.

  • 5
    0

    Dear VK

    I am very proud of you. I had a perception that the Tamil intellectuals had died off or dispersed during last thirty years. But, good to see the “Flag of Tamil Intellectuals” (Puthigeevith Kodi)is being carried by our younger generation. I have had tears in my eyes when I read your articles and very proud of you.

    Govi

  • 1
    0

    VK

    A fitting response to a man who was going on and on about his Peter Meter, and looking at his face, I thought he would be in his 60+, should he go down to this level, it was a bad taste, and disgusting really. There was nothing satire about his other than some vulgar nonsense.

    Except, cricket …I liked everything, keep writing. Very hilarious and thought provoking, maybe…a bit too much for Mahinda…and will come back with his Vadukoddai.

  • 4
    0

    Nice one Kanthaiya – You got it spot on about that group of Mahindapala, Weerawansa, Dayan J, Malinda S and Rajpal A – all great ‘patriots’ supporting the wonderful administration that unaccountably lost their positions of power due to the people’s choice. One can’t help but wonder why our people couldn’t understand the logic of these patriotic intellectuals and chose to dismiss the views of these brilliant minds and vote for the alternative put before them. Maybe it was Rajpal’s visage that put them off? Or could it have been that the ‘regime’ was far too honest, lawful and democratic for us foolish public to appreciate?

    Maybe that donkey of yours could give Mahindapala, Weerawansa, Dayan J, Malinda S and Rajpal A some advice on the result of selling their souls for the perks of power. He could also perhaps explain to them that there is a huge difference between those who sell their bodies (a far nobler profession in my view) from those who sell their souls.

    Keep on truckin’!

  • 5
    0

    Modapala has met his match- in Kanthaiyah’s donkey.

  • 3
    0

    Wait a minute while you people were laughing I got my self wet laughing and fell off the chair. By the way this ghost Kanthiaya is created by CT if my analytic mind is correct. Think I’m right in my guess work. Any way these wayward so called journalists who lives in Australia Canada and UK are desperate now not knowing what to do. I have warned SL peacemakers not let these parasites to step on BIA’S tarmac. these country dividers have no place in PEACEFUL SL.
    CT kANTHIAYA CARRY ON KEEPING US AMUSED AND GUESSING.Now where will HDL hide ? inside the Battic lo skirt??

  • 8
    1

    Ah Finally… Someone figured out how to deal with Dayan, Pala and the rest of the pseudo intellectual raise baiters. Most CT readers took these chappies for intellectuals and tried engaging them on an equal footing with arguments and counter arguments. By doing so DJ et al felt gratified that there must be “some truth” in their clap trap else how could one explain the readers responding in droves for their drivel.

    Finally Mr.K figured out the holy grail and the answer was always there for us to see.. These guys are charlatans and the only language they understand is the Donkey language and Mr K has delivered it in a most sophisticated manner..

    Bravo!!

  • 0
    0

    Mahindapala is [Edited out]. Please be kind!

  • 5
    0

    What a wonderful sarcastic way of showing the middle finger to another joker
    without having to talk about his third leg.

  • 3
    1

    Vallipuram Kandiah,

    You are the greatest Sri Lankan. You succeeded where all of us failed.

    You have terminated the two rodents of Sri Lankan political journalism. Mahindapala and Jayatilleka.

    And deservedly you used the cheapest but most appropriate weapon.

    You gave them RAT POISON. Let’s hope they take a long time to roll over while we watch.

  • 4
    0

    Everything we all wanted to say about HLDM and to some extent Dr DJ are here. Fantastic !

    • 0
      0

      Why “some extent DJ”? He is the poisonous snake in the grass. The other guy is just a garandiya.

  • 3
    0

    Brilliant!

    i am waiting for H L D Mahindapala’s vituperative attack.

    Let me guess, it may be about caste issues of the Velllala Tamils; some crude pun on your name; how the West and the Tamil diaspora are hand in glove to take on the poor Sri Lankan state or he may surprise us all with something entirely new but definitely crude and vulgar!

    • 3
      0

      The result would be Mahindapala would become a life long bedwetter.

  • 7
    0

    VK,

    Good one. I enjoyed it but for the post script. I don’t like cruelty to animals and even if your donkey wants to meet HLDM you should not let your donkey suffer such pain. Animals do have feelings, you know.

    • 3
      0

      but I have no doubt, his donkey would do the job better than Malinda Senviratne the shill of MR would make it.

  • 2
    0

    As Buddhist Sinhalese,
    I most appreciate your Forward Reply to This Disco Jokey Mahindapala, [So called Dr, Like Dr Pee Risk].
    But I do not Think that He understood what you wrote to him as he is so inclined to RAJAPASSAISM and extremism and an opportunist as per his writings.
    Who has lost his readers at Lanka web and just making hosannas to his One time patron Ma Ra ya Jarapassa and Clan.
    This Racist Sinhala Buddhist M Pala May not care or follow about simple One Buddhism precept from Five Precept Because He is a SINHALA BUDDHIST, not a Buddhist Sinhalese.
    as you say it is good to play cricket but what is the benefit we got from playing, only a corrupt executives and lazy Bunch of Youths who waste time Glued to TV.

  • 1
    0

    Mr V K, this is brilliant. Yours is a genre that geniuses HLDM, DJ et al cannot surpass in the field of entertainment. But mind you, HLDM will never say ‘die’. So there will be a response. If not, he’s lost the battle and if he does it will be the same vomit. HLDM’s journalistic genes were permanently impaired years ago by shock therapy from a cunning fox called JRJ.

    Mr K, may I request another studied piece from you on the use of the word “Scientist” in the term “Political Scientist”? In physical sciences (such as in Physics) a Scientist is an academic bound by strict adherence to the scientific method. Science abhors bias and prejudice. But some avowed political scientists openly reveal in their analyses total contempt and bias for some politicians

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