31 October, 2020

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Why Sri Lankan Men Make Women Uncomfortable 

By Yudhanjaya Wijeratne

Yudhanjaya Wijeratne

Yudhanjaya Wijeratne

If there’s one thing all my female friends have in common, it’s that all of them have been stared at, catcalled, dry-humped and masturbated at. It’s not that all of them are alluringly sexy (sorry, folks) or go out in leather and heels every day. It happens whether they’re wearing jeans, shirts, skirts, hijabs, flat, sneakers. One of them is a work colleague who helped me pick out a shirt for a wedding the other day. She could barely make it across the road to Liberty Plaza without two men following her.

As men, we don’t often see this – the moment we appear, all of this fades into the background, and we’re left to wonder what kind of peculiar first world problems women seem to have. A woman is raped every 90 minutes?

What?

___

Firstly, let’s start with the obvious: Sri Lanka, if not a rape-ey culture, a very unsafe environment for women in general. To test this, a friend and I walked for about a kilometer along Thimbirigasyaya. Then we backtracked, with her walking about 50 meters ahead and me following, and I watched.

It was disturbing. This isn’t the kind of wolf-whistling you see in Hollywood movies. It’s not the damn-she’s-hot double-take of the eyes. It’s an insolent, hostile, and yet strangely curious stare; a kind of stare that not just strips down the person on the receiving end, but also makes them feel like nothing more than a piece of meat in a dress and heels. It is the look you would give when you could either eat someone or kill them, and not necessarily in that order.Edward Cullen

It’s the kind of stare Edward Cullen would have given Bella. He’s a vampire in a badly written story. None of this is normal.

And the worst part is that this comes from not just the drug addicts and frustrated schoolboys and random seedy tuk drivers; it comes from almost everyone – from that man who looks like he stepped out of the CEB to that boy who looks like he works at a tech company.

And of course, it doesn’t stop at looks. It goes from “Psst…nangi”‘s to “Gaaana keeyada?” to all hands on deck. While my friend wasn’t touched, I think I can honestly say I’ve lost count of the times someone’s told me about being felt up under their skirt, or about being followed by a tuk, or just plain fapped at in public.

Put it this way: if it was us guys in that situation, every single street in this would have at least a couple of fights breaking out across. And while hardcore feminists will tell you that a woman can easily take on a man – I’ve met a few that could – most women aren’t going to put up a fight, especially in a skirt and heels. Most women do what they’ve been told to do: ignore it and keep walking, try not to cry – and hope they don’t touch you.YW

It isn’t just an American feminist thing.

Personally, I’m about as far from politically correct as my friends can handle – I think being fat is ugly, I think paid maternity leave is stupid, and I will eat any vegan who denies me my chicken curry. But even so, it’s a fairly fucked-up situation when women have to feel like they’re crossing a battle zone every time they move ten meters in Kollupitiya. What gives?

___

Consider our public education system, which basically involves thousands of boys cooped up with other boys for twenty years and suddenly let loose upon the world.

Having been in this system, I can tell you that it’s fairly retarded, because most students of this system grow up not knowing that a girl is basically a human. Interaction is usually limited to a homogeneous gang of hormonal schoolboys making weird noises at an equally homogenous gang of schoolgirls. The only morals you inherit are those of the pack and whatever your mother mistakenly handed you – those golden, quintessentially Sri Lankan nuggets like “you know what they say about women who wear red” and “her skirt is so short her husband must be ashamed!”. Anyone breaking this mold is respectfully deemed to have “tapped that”.

Case in point: at some point during my A/Ls a friend of mine asked me how I’d “done” seven girls. I hadn’t. I wish. I was just busy leeching chemistry notes off them. The girls I knew had better handwriting than the boys and I was damned if I was going to spend hours trying to decipher rushed scrawls.

It doesn’t help that most girls pretty much play along with this behaviour, because most of them are also stuck with a thousand or so other girls in a puritanical single-sex school and have no idea how men are actually supposed to behave.

Now, unleash this horde into the world, feed them the standard stuff about how a woman should be subordinate and all that, and you basically have our parents’ generation: a whole lot of people who basically look upon a woman as property. Even the women are busy looking on themselves as property because they’ve been taught to be prim and proper and please everyone.

Thus, the men have free license to ogle this strange species of object that they must someday take to bed and provide for, and the women resign themselves to their fates without once questioning their mothers and fathers and all the ripe idiots who feed them this tosh.

Doubt it?

It isn’t objectification. Men objectify women all the time, and women objectify men just as much; you only need to look at Cosmopolitan’s regular “battle of the bulges” listicles for verification. Sexual admiration is part and parcel of society. This isn’t sexual admiration – it’s ownership.street

And then you get our generation, who are distinctly aware that something is wrong, but the guys can get away with it and the girls only rant about it on Facebook without summoning the courage to ask “what the fuck’re you looking at?” Instead, most of them stick to strength in numbers or summon their male friends and husbands to the fore, thus affirming the dynamic. It doesn’t really matter what social class you’re in. Sometimes it’s the easy way out: sometimes it’s the only way out.

___

Now while discussing this, this friend of mine who walked across the street pointed out an interesting little factoid: a couple of years ago, she’d modelled in a slum. It was a very poor, very, very tiny community, and while she fully expected to be stared at like an exotic animal, she wasn’t. People looked and went on.

I’m no village boy, but I do have a dubious claim to that title – I live in a little village in the arse end of Ragama and partly hail from a place in Ratnapura where people give you concerned looks and make you tea if you ever make the mistake of speaking in English. But it is true that within a small community, you get much less of the leering and the rapey faces. This is largely because in a small community, you tend to a) know that girl and b) know that her father, brothers, uncles and/or any other males in the general vicinity know who you are and where you live. It’s very easy to police this kind of behaviour in a small community.

___

Does it suck that women still have to rely on men for “safety”? Yes, it does.

But that’s how it’s going to be. Until our medieval education system starts putting boys and girls together (thus promoting both empathy and teenage pregnancy), until enough ladies turn into New York-style pepper-spray carryin’ women who can take care of themselves, it’s going to forever be a standoff between the men who want you and the men who protect you.

It will take a couple of generations of determined protest to upend this state of affairs. Historically, it always does – consider, for instance, that in the U.S., a white man and a black man are technically equal – until they aren’t. That debate was won a long time ago, and the world still hasn’t caught up with the law.

Perhaps we should start teaching life skills in school? “How to Admire a Girl Without Creeping Her Out, 101?” “Counter-stalking Tactics: How To Fight Back, Women’s Edition?”men_ogle_women

But before this gets too tedious, here’s a photo of sexual admiration done right, or done wrong. The line is blurry, isn’t it? Whichever side you stand on: goddayum. Now let’s look away and try not to be creepy.

That wasn’t so hard, was it?

*Yudhanjaya Wijeratne is a contributor to Colombo Telegraph, his articles can be found on his blog, icaruswept.com

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Latest comments

  • 18
    65

    “If there’s one thing all my female friends have in common, it’s that all of them have been stared at, catcalled, dry-humped and masturbated at.”

    naturally,you are the lion race no.the sex urge is powerful in the male lion.I saw a female lion trying to take down a buffalo and struggling and struggling.The male lion was watching a few feet away.The lazy bastard was not even trying to help her.Then i saw him at last walking towards her ad i thought he is going to help her get their meal,but what does he do.He tries to hump the female from behind.That was all he was interested in.While she is trying to bring the buffalo down he is having sex with her,or trying to over and over again.So blame Mr.singhabahu,don’t blame the males here please.

    • 8
      4

      Please translate and publish in Sinhala and tamil..Sexual and gender based violence against women is all part of this MACHO culture – men own the streets and women need to fear the predator!
      There is a direct connection between sexual frustration and violence.

      The English educated are generally more able to cope with gals..

      It is the swabasha nationalist dudes who are the most sexdually frustrated and hence violent.. and the Buddhist monks. Seriously!
      They call girls nangi and akka and then treat them like sex objects only.

      Honest to god, when I was 15 years old I was “flashed” by a Buddhist month who lifted his robe to show me his treasure and I nearly threw up.. turned and fled for my life. Since then never trust a Buddhist monk and have difficulty grovelling before them!

    • 4
      6

      What you conveniently forget is it’s men who rape….NOT women.

  • 36
    2

    While a timely topic, the writer is still a young know-it-all with a very condescending tone, who doesnt seem to know that the majority of schools outside of Colombo are in fact mixed schools. It doesn’t seem to have done anything to cull this behaviour.

    • 15
      3

      herbert

      i still think mixing them up is the best way to go.even in my fish tank i used to see when females are put in, the males become less aggressive.One reason why muslim and srilankan tamil males as well as sinhala males are so agressive and violent may be due to the segregation of the sexes from their small ages.

      PS.note it is not the authors fornication intentions that i’am talking about,which may as you rightly point out make no difference whether mixed schools or not.I.am talking more of agression in males.The lack of female company i think makes males more agressive.

      • 3
        3

        shankar

        Now you can stop fantasizing Black and Decker and start learning something useful. Here is something that may help you to enlarge your narrowed view of women rights:

        Law and Sexuality : Amendments to the Penal Code, September 19, 1995

        in

        Transcending the Bitter Legacy Selected Parliamentary Speeches – Neelan Tiruchelvam

        available on

        http://noolaham.net/project/61/6067/6067.pdf

      • 12
        1

        I’m not disagreeing. What I’m saying is that the writer seems to have ascribed the cause down to this one reason when the reality is that there is so much more, beginning with the teaching of basic manners in school. Women are treated as objects anywhere. Just that in some countries men learn to disguise it better than in Sri Lanka.

  • 7
    14

    Yudhanjaya Wijeratne

    RE: Why Sri Lankan Men Make Women Uncomfortable

    “As men, we don’t often see this – the moment we appear, all of this fades into the background, and we’re left to wonder what kind of peculiar first world problems women seem to have. A woman is raped every 90 minutes?”

    “What?”

    Thanks. Very informative and interesting write-up.

    One wonders, if the women are covered head yo toe, like Niquab and Burka, this will make women less uncomfortable.

    Here, you are making a valid case for women being covered, for their own protection. Hasn’t this been happening throughout history? Is this part of evolution, predator vs. pray?

    What is quite interesting is that Law will not not necessarily protect the women from these predators. That is why a woman is raped every 90 minutes! Chopping the heads off of rapists will certainly help.

    So, a case can be made got the women to be clad in Niquab or in a Burka, for their OWN protection from men. This is precisely the basic reason given by Muslim men, as to why women should be covered from head to toe and segregated from men, for their own protection.

  • 25
    2

    We are a sick society and certainly not Buddhist as American embassy said years ago.
    The lack of proper policing ,the teaching in schools,the the uneducated drug dealing rapist filth in parliament and not only the Rajapaksas?
    We can send our wives overseas to work and rape our daughters pretending we are Buddhist or catholic to escape our low caste while tolerating pervert monks?
    We are fifty to a hundred years behind Singapore and other Asian countries and that is how the filth in parliament like it.

    • 7
      4

      janaka

      “We are fifty to a hundred years behind Singapore and other Asian countries and that is how the filth in parliament like it.”

      What are you talking about?

      This is the Dhamma Deepeaya, Faith Island, where Sinhala “Buddhism” will flourish for 5,000 years. Just read the Mahawamsa Chronicles by Ven. Buddhist Monk Mahananma!

      Or is it the Mara Deepaya, the Devils Island? We had a President called MaRa. Some say, he was a re-incarnation of Mara.

  • 13
    57

    I think this guy has too much free time and wild imagination. Just don’t cook up stories to fill pages. Sri Lanka is a safe place for women. Sheesh why don’t you write about the Underworld or Police Corruption or something like that, which requires more than an imagination to write.

    • 29
      1

      Sri Lanka a safe place for women? What are you smoking and may I have some of it?

      As a Sri Lankan woman living in Sri Lanka, after being harassed, leered at, flashed at, jacked off at, reduced to tears and even solicited, even when in school uniform, I humbly beg to differ.

      The ones who liked your comment are just as dilusional as you are

      • 2
        1

        Patriot, Sri Lanka is a very safe place. I can agree with you IF Vithya, Seya, Wasim Thajudeen, Mohamed Sulaiman, Mohammed Shyam, to name a few could come out of their graves and approve your claim.

        As Ann says you have been smoking something out of the ordinary.

      • 3
        3

        Ann

        “As a Sri Lankan woman living in Sri Lanka, after being harassed, leered at, flashed at, jacked off at, reduced to tears and even solicited, even when in school uniform, I humbly beg to differ.”

        Even little boys and girls will agree with you who were abused by Sinhala “Buddhist” monks dicks.

    • 0
      2

      Rape happens, corruption happens, cruelty happens every single day…& who is done???NOTHING

  • 12
    15

    if every many was uninterested in females the species will die off , or a hermaphrodite human species would evolve like clown fish . Now this would be a very interesting development evolution wise wouldn’t it .

    Why do women spend hours dressing up , it is their evolutionary need to be looked at . it is just the annoying school boys the tuk tuk drivers they has an issue with . if it was some famous actor they would be thrilled wouldn’t it ? Smart women and men for that matter know how to deflect attention (unrequired)

    I mean your article is an interesting one but no new ground has been covered imho .

  • 6
    1

    Yudhanjaya

    Thank you for the good subject to talk about.

    Please let me give my observation.

    Boys coming from boys only schools are generally weak in tackling girls unless supported by family background.

    Girls coming from girls only schools easily fall into prey of bad fellows unless supported by family background.

    Boys and girls from mixed schools enjoy the freedom to share love and kindness and understand that they’re alike and only the life’s responsibility is different; have the uncanny ability to understand the Achilles heels of each other.

    So they have the ability to drag, mainly boys or girls from separate schools to their feet.

    Most probably the staring at, catcalling, dry-humping, and masturbating crowd come from boys only schools.

    So please make all the schools MIXED; letting them do any damn thing with good understanding.

  • 16
    0

    what to say Aney????????.

    Still we are depending on poor women to feed us, what they are sending from toiling in middle east,
    Shamefully they have to feed the our former and new beggars group at Diyawannaoya Asylum too.

    No respect for sri Lankan Women from our men.

    What shameless nation????????

  • 5
    5

    Men are just closet perverts. There are no inbetweeners. Even dogs have a limited time to be in heat. But men ! Any time anywhere any woman. Yuk.

  • 8
    6

    What you describe is a disease affecting modern humans. The sexualization of the female as commodity by the advertisement and movie industry has resulted in a response in the male. Sexual signals emanating from the female beyond those of the pheromones augment sexuality of the female and in response to the higher levels of testosterone produced by the testicle, the males brain response as designed. The brain centers that exert some control over sexual behavior are overwhelm the brain. The balls begin to control the brain, instead of the reverse!

    The male is a victim as much as the hypersexualized female!

    Dr.Rajasingham Narendran

    • 2
      6

      Correction:

      Sexual signals -through a combination of perfumes, selective physical exposure, dress, walk, make-up etc.- emanating from the female beyond those of the pheromones,augment sexuality. In response, higher levels of testosterone is produced by the testicles of the males and their brains respond as designed.The other brain centers that normally moderate male sexual behavior are overwhelmed as a result. The balls begin to control the brain, instead of the reverse!’

      Dr.RN

  • 4
    0

    How DID you get that photograph! It’s a scream.
    The last one, of course.

  • 4
    0

    How DID you get that photograph! It’s a scream.
    The last one, of course.
    One can’t tell whether Sarkozy is appreciating the view or amused at Obama’s reaction.

  • 9
    2

    Why Sri Lankan Men Make Women Uncomfortable

    It is simply animal emotions. I heard, because of their women migrating to middle east money,they victimize even daughters and grad daughters.

    Simply animal behaviour, not like human who are said to be mentally advanced.

  • 7
    13

    Women like appreciation and compete with each other for appreciation. Make-up and dress are used by them to attract others. Men, as an animal, look at women. If they look at a woman for more than 8.2 seconds, there are chances of him falling in love with her (or to have sex with her?). Anything shorter than that means he is not interested. Few years back, a woman became famous after she posted a video of comments and looks at her in New York streets, in the social media. New York has mixed schools; Minimum age to marry is 14 years; Condoms are compulsorily given to students from Grade 8 onward; Still, comments, looks and rapes are generally happening. Pepper spray and judo do not help them.

    Sri Lankans do not appreciate beauty and sexual attractions by words, they use a glance. The women here are used to it and mostly take it on a positive note, unless it crosses the line (the line differs with each woman, depending on her wishes). Americans cannot understand this. If someone says ‘hey you are very sexy!’ here, there would be an instant murder.

    Before comparing attitudes, it is better to learn about the culture and values, you, young city boy.

    • 2
      1

      Villageman:

      Practice these things with your family first.

      when Face book like social media are there, when pornography is available freely, they see even 80 year old grand mothers good for sex.

      I heard, boys in India are confused. Because mothers use their children. Fathers are busy earning money in the middle east.

      world is that low. Capitalism is spreading it’s arms the wrong way. Politicians and businesses are destroying the world money.

      • 3
        1

        jim softy the dimwit

        “I heard, boys in India are confused. Because mothers use their children. Fathers are busy earning money in the middle east.”

        Here in this island, mothers go to eke out a living in Middle East Medieval Kingdoms, work under appalling working conditions to keep the family afloat and the husbands happy.

        Do you know what the fathers do in return?

        They molest their daughters when they are sober as well as drunk.

    • 0
      0

      villageman

      “Women like appreciation and compete with each other for appreciation. Make-up and dress are used by them to attract others. “

      When a women encounter another women who more attractive and beautiful than her, she withers. Does it happen to the other female primates?

  • 11
    0

    I can confirm that I too have witnessed the terrible cat calls and uncalled for remarks of men at passing girls especially. I was shocked that it happens on public streets – Kollupitiya! I do not know how our girls and women manage.

    My diagnosis is that we Sri Lankans do not respect others enough, not only girls. We do not respect the other sex, ethnicity, religion, colour and nationalities.

    All our religion is sham – confined to formal worship and superficial observances. Our society is heading for trouble.

    Every 90 minutes – not only 1 rape but children as young as five are abused and violated!

  • 1
    26

    The way women dress can be also a factor.
    (Don’t give me the bs on they can dress what ever they want)
    Men are biological animals.and when women are dressed provocatively
    Men get excited, I don’t see Muslim women dressed in hijab being Harresed.
    Dress which doesn’t show the female form will go a long way to stop most
    Rapes and sexual Harresments.
    But then women are following Bollywood and they want to dress like the
    Half naked Indian actresses, and follow Delhi as a rape capital.

    I am not blaming the women hear, but trying to give a solution, why thing happen
    When certain action are taken.
    People will cite Europe, but Europe has gone through this – and now women are not
    Looked at all, and homosexuality is the in thing there- may be because of too much flesh
    Showing off. Less children. And some cases negative birth rates.

  • 3
    17

    In Sri lanka, women also like it. Women wear cloths as a slut would wear. women acting in Radio, probably in TV too act like sluts. All women and men from dysfunctional marraiges are looking for adultary.

    But, always two handed are needed for it and you can not clap with one hand.

    Law enfocement also can not neglect sexual haressment saying it is all woman’s fault. Sri lanka also should enact laws which says even the husband can not have sex with the wife is the wife does not agree. A man can not touch a woman if she says don’t.

  • 1
    2

    To solve this problem we should have strip clubs and toys this will solve all the frustration.

  • 1
    6

    if theirs a way to eliminate internet social media smart phone and the way woman dress up these days can reduce this cases by 50%

  • 4
    11

    Truth is, Lankan women are following the American and Western culture of assertiveness, primed up looks, education, confidence, independence, and allure.

    In the Western culture, this comes with open relations with males, from an early age. Then there’s also LGBTQ. To combat all the after-effects, there is safe-sex and abortion rights. This is all due to America, having no other avenue but to be a business enterprise. They need to put sexuality out of the way, and concentrate on capitalistic money-making for survival, as they distroyed their traditional farming techniques when they killed off the Native Indians.

    Sri Lanka being of traditional Buddhistic values, together with Hindu, Muslim, and pre-American Christian values is thus out of sync with the modern American sexual revolution culture that is imperative for America’s survival.

    Lankan men, hence suffer grossly in the absence of freely-given sex that America encourages. A better culture has to emerge from women, so our Lankan boys can be looked after. Traditional pre-independence Lankan lifestyles need to be encouraged.

    • 7
      1

      ramona grandma therese fernando

      “Traditional pre-independence Lankan lifestyles need to be encouraged.”

      Including Kandyan hospitality, wife battering, monastic slavery, child marriage, capital punishment in various forms, kāya-danda, vachi-danda, dhana-danda, mano- danda, Whipping, beating, branding, mutilation and cutting off hair, cutting and pulling away flesh by Pincers, burning with hot Irons clapped to skin, …………………….

      • 3
        2

        Pre-Kandyan lifestyles, I mean…….

  • 31
    2

    Dear idiots:

    here’s a little quiz for you dumb fucks:
    What is the main cause of rape in Lanka?
    A) the influence of western culture
    B) women dressing slutty
    C) rapists

    Please cut your own dick off if you answered A or B.

    Thanks,
    Love from the female population

    • 2
      0

      This is the most awesome comment I’ve ever read on CT! Unfortunately most of the idiots on this site probably answered A or B. Then again half the country voted for Jarapassa.

  • 9
    8

    I think there are times its the women who make the men uncomfortable.Recently at a party a lady was dressed in a low cut gown and a revealing dress that made he husband feel quite uneasy as the other guests stared at her some with a feeling of disgust and less of admiration. One guy who was a close acquaintance of the couple took the man to a corner and whispered to him “Matchan couldnt your wife have worn a more decent attire?” to which the man replied “I fully agree to what you say but today its a woman’s world and we men have to play second fiddle to the opposite sex so my plea to her to dress more modestly just fell on deaf ears”
    Even sometimes at some dances where ones wife is dancing with another participant while the husband is soaking himself some women exhibit more intimacy resulting in the hubby”s boozing pals having a jibe at the man pointing at the happenings on the dance floor.Of course these are isolated incidents but with sexual promiscuity now being more prevalent incidents of a similar nature appear to be on the increase.
    It takes two hands to clap so putting the entire blame on the man may sound unfair as women too are sometimes contributory to men acting in an improper manner.

    • 0
      3

      Yeah, we’ve all done that Colin……guess people dancing to primordial beats invokes some spiritual energy (aside from sexual energy….though there is a small chance that the two might cross)….the question is, how far are we to go in curbing exuberance. One way is of course for all to become clergy, or to play the role even in the conjugal situation. However, modern dancing based on African drums and rhythm, is nothing new to Sri Lanka. It’s more cultural fun, where though one looks bad, one releases excess energy on the dance floor in transcendent whimsical happiness. Actually if women actually dance with these men, in good natured fun, it will heal a lot of their frustration, and give them greater assurance. Cleavage for Lankan society is also nothing new.

      Problem of insecure men is more elusive than that. Probably it is because modern education is structured in such a way, that it is easier for girls to study better than boys. Too many young men are out of work and out of confidence, and their primal desires and deep longed for aspirations cannot be realized to easily. Also is the free nature of foreign culture that is seen on TV and internet, with the sinking realization by the average Lankan male that he will never partake in it. All in all, purveyors of culture should emphasize a beau monde Lankan culture, so Lankan society can retain its flavor, and thereby give confidence to especially her young men.

      • 6
        0

        Many Psychiatrists have stated their opinion that men now being subjected to plenty of sexual exposure through the internet,etc etc have resulted in a reduction of their sexual prowess. This could be possible as the mystery of sex that prevailed before the sexual revolution does not exist now. If anything is freely available it loses its value.
        Sex was instilled in the human being mainly so that a husband and wife could act in the confines of their privacy in a process of procreating the human race . But now the female body is being used as a tool for Commercial purposes so much so that one who indulges in prostitution is now called a sex worker.Further fashion shows and beauty contests have become an occasion for men to satisfy their lusts than the participants to display their clothes or beauty.If you wish to select a lady as a beauty queen why on earth do you want them to parade in their bikinis?

        I think the women should carry more of the blame since they could put their foot down and tell the male “Hey my body is not to be used as a tool for selling your products it has a function to be a mother,a sister,daughter and it is part of humanity just as much as you are so lay off”/ Thats liberation ladies !!

        • 1
          6

          I agree somewhat Colin.

          But it must be remembered that bikinis came around when Americans went to the Pacific Islands, and saw the Polynesian women (and men), swim naked, or wear something that resembled a bikini. Women in Japanese fishing villages also went naked, when they went diving for shell-fish and pearls. Nakedness in those regions did not invoke lust. Victorian to pre-2nd-world-war women felt so cloistered in their dress that they decided to follow those Pacific people, and liberate themselves from unnecessary clothes during hot summer weather.

          Indeed, in Western countries, women in bikinis do not invoke lust. It’s all to do with perception: if everyone does it in the correct context (on the beach for example), men won’t become aroused by it. But if women wore bikinis unnecessarily in the corporate office, it would be a terrible handicap to the men. Yet, it is preferable for White women not to sit in the sun too much and wear bikini, because the sun can cause skin cancer as their skin lacks the melanin factor….but guess they do not want to be outdone by dark skin women enjoying the sun.

          Look at the Middle East places where women are mostly completely covered up. At the time of war and refugee crisis, what happens? The level of sexual abuse is rampant. Women are examined naked, and sold as slaves to men; girls under 14, and at times of 8 or 9 years of age are given in marriage to be divorced the next day by Isis inspired culture. All this comes from a culture where women who are entirely covered up, are supposed to be respected and cared for. Refugees prefer to escape to Europe where they then find everything wrong with European secular culture, and bomb European cities in anger. Refugee women insist of their right of the Islamic burkini, in the midst of hot summer weather, together with their scorn of what they see as unclothe women in bikinis. In the ME, they are not even allowed on the beach, and have fatwas against them if they swim, as the sea is considered male.

          The beauty of the human body is celebrated with beauty queens in bikini. This is again part of the European heritage, as is also found in their historical art-work. It is quite different from sex-videos and online sex. Now that is a deliberate commercial trade that twists the minds and corrupts society. That is the thing that needs to be banned and have stiff penalties on.

          As for Sri Lanka, I guess the women too wore the amudeh only when they went swimming, till the Europeans came and told them to cover up. But generally Lankan men are perverse. Possibly it is because many of their mothers are not around in their growing up years, as many are working in the middle-east. Even in the extended family, women are not around as they too work abroad. They have no female relationship to guide them.

          It’s mostly a socio-economic issue, one of which we have to be aware and considerate of. Yes, it’s up to women to understand and care for their sons, brothers, fathers, grandfathers, and dress and act according to the standard heritage of the land.

  • 0
    0

    Sri Lankan males are free to follow their religion. Let’s see:

    ” Even as rain penetrates as ill-thatched house,
    so does lust penetrate an undeveloped mind.
    Even as rain does not penetrate a well-thatched house,
    so does lust not penetrate a well-developed mind.”

    Assuming that’s the problem, looks like we need another 2000 years.

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    I stumbled upon your article because I am very disconcerted by my classmates who don’t seem to know how to take a bath properly or not look like crazed rapists before stepping inside the school. This is what I am most puzzled about. Even if it’s an all male school, don’t they teach proper grooming or how to look presentable at the very least? It is interesting, the generalization that all women depend on men for protection. Because I never have. Men have attacked and disrespected me for being strong all my life. I have learned to be strong on my own. And although it wasn’t a pretty experience I am grateful for it because now I feel free. And empowered. I don’t feel the need to put up with anything that makes me feel tethered. Most especially a rude man. Your article was very enlighting by the way. Thanks.

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